[[0026]] Day 3 of Self-Isolation

Today... was a weird one. Very weird. You can see the changes slowly happening across the city, the panic buyers still out there lugging heavy bags, an empty hospital waiting room... is Ghost Town coming?

Day 3 (This was more like social distancing day through NO choice of my own, but whatevs)

Good evening and welcome to your third instalment of Queenie's self-isolation diaries. I will point out, today was more of a social distancing day and honestly? I have realised how hard it is to social distance if you are using public transport or going to the hospital. 

Let's try and turn today into a mood sammich!!! 🥪🥪🥪

I see you are all recoiling in shock? Yes, I took a bus, well four buses today. And then hospital too. Alas, let me explain! This is essentially the last day I will NEED to leave the house. Long story short, I have three appts, of which two are today and one would have been tomorrow. SO, the diabetes support nurse appointment ended up being a phone appointment (I also forgot I had it so wouldn't have made it in time) and the appointment at X Ray for the kidney and bladder ultra sound has been cancelled for now, but have to contact them in two weeks if I end up being isolated for twelve. HOWEVER, renal told me to attend the bloods, so conflicted, I did. But I tried to make the best of a bad situation regardless. 

I got to see a work colleague which was wonderful cos there are a few people I am missing at work. And a couple of nurses, one I saw in renal and one I just tend to see in the smoking area, were outside so I got to see and chat with them (the dark humour was STRONG today). And I got to see my fave phlebotomist too (the one best at getting my bloods) so take that as a big win too. SO all in all, my short time out was pleasant. And don't worry, I made sure I used social distancing the whole damn time. 

Now, for a double filling of bad, well bad and gone off filling for the mood sandwich.

So I said in the opening that you can see that things are starting to change, and considering the last time I went out was on Tuesday, a lot has changed since Tuesday. So, for example, less people on the first bus to town so was able to comfortable social distance near the back, and then I got to the bus station and just DAMN SUNSHINE, you could tell there was a change in the atmosphere (luckily, I missed an idiot where some jerk had a go at an elderly person for coughing).

Considering I was stood at stand B... this is pretty empty for the local station. And buses coming from the nearby places and villages all seemed to have at most, four or five people on them, for what I could see. One bus turned up and no-one got on, which is kinda weird to see. I must admit, there were about eleven people behind this photo, queuing for my bus, so I did my best to distance from all of them as we eventually got on, and thankfully, 9 people all say on the left hand side of the bus, so only three of us spaced far out on the right, so can't complain too much. However, I can imagine at rush hour and work start time, the station is a lot fuller, so in a way, I am kind of glad I am not dealing with that, cos social distancing would be a lot harder that way. And tbh, it is going to get MUCH harder.

Caught these signs shown on the right, stuck to the doors before you get on the bus. And long story short, they are reducing their services, which I actually understand as it may encourage people to stay home and not bother going out, perhaps, and I guess help reduce the increase in transmissions that more regular services will cause. BUT, with reduced services, I can imagine that is more people piling onto a singular bus, specially int the morning... and again, I don't know if I want to be on the tail end of that, least of all at rush hour and home time, I can imagine what is left of the services will be rammed.

Anyway, get to the hospital, sanitised my hands like a good NHS worker, and then I saw the haem waiting area and oh my, it was such a change (a change for the better though no less). I'm used to seeing the haem clinic a lot cos I tend to work mainly on notes for haematology clinics, so I speak t the receptionist a lot and so on. Normally, you get a numbered ticket (for routine bloods, like forms from renal or diabetes clinics or from your doctor) and then sit in the main waiting area, people only wait in the seating area outside the double doors if the main area is full. Not today though. We get a ticket then go and sit in the outside area until called, whereas the main waiting area I think was clinics and emergency only?

But yeah, the new place to wait was, different. But clever and I see the logic behind it. So that is how the chairs are now arranged as you wait, so means you can distance quite nicely, so yeah, pretty clever. There were other rules like no kids under 12 and chaperones limited to one person and stuff like that. So kudos to haem, you're doing great!!! The whole waiting area was talking though, mainly about Covid-19 but it was nice to wait and not like, be bored and fall asleep like I normally do. 

Either way, places are definitely following with drastic changes, whether the hospital or the buses and shops and things. Things are changing and it is really really weird. 

So, for another icky sammich filling.

OMFG OW. SO MUCH OW. LIKE WHY AM I EVEN DIABETIC IF THEY CAN'T EVEN GET BLOOD OUT OF ME EASILY? WHY ARE MY VEINS SO CRAPPY? WHY WHEN I PREPARE FOR BLOODS TO BE TAKEN DOES MY VEINS SHRIVEL UP AND SAY LOL NOPE NOT TODAY MOTHERFUCKER.

Urgh.

I have this massive problem with blood tests and I don't even know why. Like I am not anxious when I get them done, I kind of find it fascinating if I am perfectly honest (and the colour is pretty haha). 

So I get in, explain to the lady I am a nightmare for bloods, she tries in my arm first, fat nope. Warms up a glove full of water for my hand... says nope. This is pretty much twenty minutes later and thankfully, she finally got taken off for her lunch (bless her, she was over running with me) and the lady that can get my blood came out. Saw her a couple of times when I was on the ward last year and seen her a couple of times since, she actually remembered me, and yes, she got it out. Alas, ouch. So much ouch omg. 

Again, you can tell there is a virus about because you have to keep the cotton wool and plasters on for a couple of hours now, to stop infection. Normally, I heal straight away as crap at bleeding, alas, have to be safe now. I could prob take them off now actually... I kinda forgot XD

AND NOW for the GRAND FINALE!!!

IT IS HERE IT IS HERE TODAY IS THE BIG DAY I HAVE WAITED FOR FOR SO DAMN LONG... ANIMAL CROSSING NEW HORIZONS IS OUT NOWWWWWW OH YES!

As you can see, I am so excited about this, you have no idea (you totally have an idea, I can see it now haha. I think I was gonna wait till my birthday to get it cos dollar is low atm, but the other half came up with a plan for the sheer fact that we all know I am going to go absolutely spare in the house once it is all tidied and I have run out of things to do. Plus, Animal Crossing is such a calm and chill game, you just can't be mad when you play it!!! Absolutely loved New Leaf, so the fact I was able to get this on release day is absolutely mental (alas I am gutted I missed out on the tote, the badges and the free poster the other half gave away cos he is too nice and yes I am still mad about it cos that kid can have a birthday outside and I won't be able to). ANYWAY, we are gonna hopefully stream it later, as I cannot play till the other half is home (the fact he has given me it now is sooooooooo infuriating as it is right next to me and so tempting plus I might need to make space on my switch...) But yes, please go and check us out later tonight and maybe tomorrow, over on our mixer, here and if you are bored now, check out my personal stream over here as I begin the Genesect research story event!! 

Well, that is it for now.

Over and out, mes amigos.

[[0007]] Week 2 Overview

Howdy folks, I'm finally back with this weeks diabetes and life overview and boy, hasn't it been a bloody week and a half! 

I'm not gonna ramble on too much about the bad shizzle that happened this week, you can read all about it by following this link right here!!

Long story short, it was hell. So many low blood sugars resulting in a day off work (which I am rather pissed at myself about, alas, sometimes we cannot control these things). I still don't know what happened, but I am more than adamant that it is due to my nighttime Lantus insulin because absolutely nothing else makes sense to me anymore! Also forgot to mention in that bad day blog post that I had to blood test every hour or two on that Tuesday day off just to make sure I didn't let my blood sugars drop again and oh God, my finger tips still feel it now.

I do hope it is enough for the consultant to let me go on to the Libre though... although I have heard

there is a shortage in the little things at the moment, but I don't see him till a week on Tuesday so maybe eventually things will sort out? I do realise that I need a constant glucose monitor at this point as it'll be easier to monitor the trends in my bloods in relation to food and carbs (especially if I have to carb count soon, urgh). I do hope as well, that it means I can finally go on to the long acting Tresiba insulin my dietitian told me a lot about, after all, the diabetes doctors at my local hospital supposedly all swear by it, and I honestly thing a change in long acting meds may be what I need.

So, what else has happened this week? WELL, for the first time in the longest time, I finally went out to play some Pokemon GO (the game that helped me and Jakey meet!) as it was Piplup community day today and it meant I got to meet my lovely friend who caught loads of Ralts for me on another community day that I was unable to attend, so I finally got a shiny Gardevoir for my Pokemon collection, wooo! Very happy about that oh yes!

I haven't been out much to play the games I love as I am always worried nowadays that I might hypo at any time, especially this week but I am so glad I went out. Saw lots of friends, got lots of shinies (and 19p croissants for dinner, absolutely banging!) and all in all, just had a fantastic three hours out the house! I need to keep reminding myself that it is okay to go out and not every day is a bad hypo day or neuropathy day, it's at least good to go and try and do the things I absolutely love! I also have to remember that the neuropathy isn't horribly bad in my foot yet and that I am lucky it is not in my left foot, so I need to make the most of not having both feet in pain whilst I can!!!

SO, up above is the graph of the blood results I have taken this week... at least I can say there has definitely been a lot less hypos and a few more blood sugars in the correct range, but the fact my hypos out number my hypers is still a bit scary to see. Thankfully, the last two days, I have woken up with blood sugars between 6 and 7.5mmol/L which isn't bad. The change I made, is that I try to drink something a bit sugary before bed and so far, it seems to be working. I do however, need pay day to hurry up so I can get some milk to drink before bed as that is slightly better than digging into the hypo supplies to stop night time hypos. I'm going to pray so damn hard that I don't have anymore morning hypos next week... I have honestly had enough of them!!!

My mental health, sadly, has taken a dip this week... which is scaring me a little bit and of course, I am worried that it may scare Jake a little too. I am waiting for counselling though so fingers crossed that helps! What I know has not helped me is the fact I do not sleep my solid 6 hours that I used to do on my old antidepressants... so again, something else to speak to the doctors about at my appt in a weeks time. Long story short (again), when I was in hospital, they changed my normal Mirtazapine (only antidepressant that helps you sleep) for Duloxitine, which is a drug for diabetic neuropathy that is also an antidepressant, but that new medication honestly hates me, and the stresses of this week and the lack of sleep has really made my mental health suffer to the point I've had thoughts that absolutely terrify me. I won't act on them, thankfully, but it has spurred me to get these meds changed so I can at least be on my old meds again with something new for the neuropathy... watch this space I guess!!!

I have tried a few tactics to help me sleep, and boring and repetitive seems to be the way to go for me haha! So, many of you may know I absolutely love Pokemon and have done for years and the new game for Nintendo Switch is absolutely AMAZING (and so British it hurts haha) but I have however completed the Pokedex and the game so what to do next? Simple, SHINY HUNT.

I both enjoy and regret starting this, but its so boring and repetitive at times that it just makes me fall asleep so I'm gonna stick at it for now. Not only that, I may have caught the shiny bug at last!

With previous Pokemon games, I never really went out of my way to hunt shinies, if I got them then great but if I didn't then meh, whatever. But... with some friends at work doing the same and seeing how cool some of the new generation shinies look... I had to get in on it! My first one had to be Dreepy, that derpy dragon looking thing in the picture. There is a method called the Masuda Method in which you use a Pokemon (in my case, a Ditto) from a foreign country and if you have the shiny charm as well, you luck drops to 1.500something in getting a shiny to hatch out of an egg. 250ish eggs later, I got Dreepy! Next was Galarian Zigzagoon (which not shiny, is black and white and looks like it should be in KISS haha!!) but I wanted this one so when evolved into its majestic blue and red glory, I could call it David Bowie and after 62 eggs, I got him too! AND THEN we get Impidimp, and although not confirmed to be based on Lincoln Imp, we assume it is... but the shiny is so cool... try telling that to my brain and I should have given up because it took three/four nights of constant game play and 608 eggs lates, finally got the shiny little guy... but ho damn it was hell.

Supposedly another tactic is shiny encounters in the wild which I haven't done before so I am going to try that out over the next couple of days... and then back to eggs to get my shiny yellow Lucario for my team haha! I am slowly making a list of shinies I want to find so fingers crossed, that will keep me busy until the DLC expansion passes are out in June and Autumn this year.

My, thats a lot of Pokemon talk but honestly? Playing so much of it has chilled me out and made things a little better this week. It's honestly kept me going, given me something to look forward to whilst waiting for Jake to get home to me after work (I still hate being on my own) and it's giving me something to do in my lonely lunch breaks too! Which brings me on to something else I have been thinking about as well, especially with the shiny hunting and expansion passes coming out, but after mine and Jakey's streaming session on Saturday night (catch us next week on mixer playing Fortnite again), I think I want to use my personal mixer to stream Pokemon games, such as community days on Pokemon GO and well, the new content coming out, as well as shiny hunting cos supposedly people like that. Plus, Saturday just gone was the first time my Fortnite gameplay was live for people to see, and I think I had some alright moments... the buzz is real and I want to stream more!!! Especially if I can help raise more money for JDRF with it in the future too.

Well, that's it for my week guys! Ups and downs and geeky glory... pretty normal in my not-so ordinary world!!! Not to see what next week brings, alas... time to go do more shiny hunting haha LETS DO THIS! 

[[0004]] Week 1 Overview

Hello everyone! I've reached 150 pageviews, so thank you! I only hope from here out on out, the blog continues to grow and hopefully help teach people and support others too. I've decided that on each Sunday, to help encourage me with my diabetic control, that I will post an overview of the week, so in that I can see any trends and good days as well as any bad days and places that I need to improve.

1) Me and Jake before our first live stream of the year!

So to kick things off, what have I been up to? So, as well as starting a blog about type 1 diabetes, another New Years resolution that myself and my fiance had was to start live streaming a little more. This was because of the 24 hour event we did last year to raise money for one of my favourite charities, JDRF in which we raised just over £200 to go towards research into finding a cure for type 1 diabetes. We enjoyed the stream so much, and its also a dream of Jake's, that we wanted to start streaming more... so as of this Saturday, we will now be found on mixer (Queen and McBooty) every Saturday and once a fortnight (starting Tuesday 14th January) and we hope to keep this up throughout the year! We will also be participating in further 24 hour fundraisers for JDRF in the future, so keep a look out for us! And feel free to pop us a follow on mixer too~

2) Cuddles with my baby princess. Actual cuddles!

Since being taken into hospital last year and realising some big changes needed to occur in my life, I began taking a Wednesday off work. This is mainly to recuperate after two full days in a row at work, allowing me to rest up my foot before going back to work for Thursdays and Fridays. 

Don't get me wrong, I miss working full time, but this was for the best for me, and I am not losing out too too much now that Jake works full time too. I tried to work three days in a row last year and I was absolutely exhausted and in a lot of pain... so never again from here on out. 

So what did I do with my day? Spent most the morning with my two cats, Pom Pom and Magnus, in bed, as I was told by the other half to actually have a rest day and not touch any cleaning or tidying until the weekend haha! I won't lie, I had an amazing and chilled Wednesday morning, because Magnus came to sit on my chest (which she used to do a lot as a kitten to keep warm, but not so much anymore) and then she slipped to a small gap between my arm and side, and placed a paw over me like a proper cuddle and honestly, I had the most amazing nap like this, it was bloody wonderful! 

I have been struggling a lot emotionally this week, a lot has suddenly changed which is funny because I knew the changes were coming but they still hit me like a brick. I actually used to be really independent, and then I met Jake and realised I didn't need to be as much as a hard ass as I was before (trust me, there were damn good reasons as to why I was such an independent hard ass, but that is a story for another day). I may have got too used to having him around all the time, making me food and looking after me and so on, as this was the week he finally went on to his night shifts and even that they start three hours after my own shifts, that equates to an extra four hours of being home on my own, and then a whole day with my Wednesdays off too. It's sad, but I miss having someone to travel to work with and have lunch with then travel home and have dinner with, but I'm sure I will adjust in time... hopefully. Or pray he gets a day shift like me, I can live in hope!

Wednesday again was a weird one. I ended up needing to go to the shop, but couldn't find jeans to wear and cried about that and went back to bed to wake up to a massive hypo. So, I tried to wear Jake's jeans but I'm a lil too big in the butt for them to do up, so had a cry about that. I then cried because I stubbed my toe, and because Spotify came out of my account when it shouldn't have, and when I couldn't find socks and then because the house was too quiet and all in all, Wednesday morning was great but the rest was just utter stress. I got through it though. I just hope the next Wednesday off is better... I know the emotions and crying was because of the hypo... but oh God, I felt so stupid.

3) Bar graph of the weeks blood
test results.

SO, blood results and stats for this week! Because yes, I might not be in a Science role at the moment, but you can't take the Science of the ex-Masters biosciences student so graphs and stats can be sadly and oddly satisfying!

Both graphs display the same results, but I know for some people, one is easier to read that the other, so take a peak at whichever you like! (Personally, I prefer the bar graph because pretty colours but the line graph is much easier to read and see the changes in blood sugar results).

These results are dated from the 6th to the 12th January, and looking at the results, they are interesting.

I still haven't been able to stabilise my blood sugar results, which still infuriates me (and sometimes, makes me just want to give up with even trying).

4) Line graph of the weeks blood
test results.

I have technically had six hypos this week, although only five are shown on the graph. This is because when I took one of the results, the one that said 4.0, I ended up having a hypo on the bus home so had to quickly sort it out when I got off at the bus station, thank goodness for the local coop that is there! 

You'll also notice that towards the end of the week, I ended up having three hypos in the space of about 36 hours. I don't think I have mentioned this yet, but, I either have one hypo or three in a short space of time, no more, no less haha and I have honestly just got used to it! These hypos started just after midnight on Friday night, I was very tired so I think I went to bed early, woke up having a hypo, then woke up in the morning having another one. I was then fine for the rest of the day, then had one this Sunday morning when I woke up! Thankfully, we knew I would end up with a third so we managed to pick up some hypo drink and snacks yesterday so it was easy to sort out... the two hypos previous? Not so much... that ended up being a result of scraping together the last of the Christmas sweets and chocolate, two thirds of a pack of biscuits and Pepsi Max with sugar mixed in to it... it worked... but definitely not my ideal way of fixing my hypos.

Good news for next week however is that thanks to my Dad, we went food shopping today so managed to stock up on big bottles of sugary energy drink and a couple of other bits, so we should be okay for the next two weeks until our big payday! 

5) Weekly blood result stats

I guess I kind of did my own little science experiment with myself this week as well. On Thursday night, I left my insulin pen at work, which meant I couldn't have any dinner when I got back from work as no medication to counteract those carbohydrates, noooo! This was the day my blood sugar was 4.0mmol/L after I finished prepping a massive clinic at work. I could feel my lips going a bit tingly and my concentration draining, so I had a hypo drink and left to go home then realised I didn't have my insulin with me and I was absolutely famished! So began the hunt for finding food I could eat that I did not need to medicate for. 

When I was in hospital, I learnt that there are some foods and snacks that I don't need to do insulin for as they have no carbs or sugar in them and until then, I honestly had no idea about any of this at all! One of these things is cheese... absolutely no carbs so I can eat as much as I like and not need to do a drop of insulin and because I absolutely LOVE cheese, I could not have been more happy about this. But finding something cheap was going to be a lot harder. There was nothing in the shop near the bus station so I checked the one nearer to my house, and there they had these amazing mini sweet chilli peppers stuffed with cream cheese and when I got home, I devoured the heck out of them. My body was so ready. When Jake got back from work, I did another blood test and the result was still really good, 4.9mmol/L! That was because of the energy drink I'd had at work to stop my hypo and nothing to do with my peppers and cheese... so now I try to make sure I have more cheese and vegetable snacks so I don't have to med before I eat (which helps me feel a little bit more normal, which is nice in my not so ordinary little world). I've decided when our finances are a little better, I am going to do a kind of insulin fast in a way, where I will be able to check if my night time basal dose of Lantus insulin is correct, by only eating foods I don't need to medicate for (this includes meat as well as cheese, eggs, small bags of crisps and vegetables).

And finally, the overall blood stats for the week. I'd say to not pay attention to the average of 10.1mmol/L as this is a culmination of all the results, so does not take into account the blood sugar results when I have not tested. I am going to try to do more results next week as well as begin to count the amount of carbohydrates in my foods before medication, although I already know it may take me a little longer to adjust to doing that one. Overall, I am pleased with my evening blood results more so than my lunch time ones at work as for some reason, they always seem to run a little higher so I know I need to look into that further... but all in all, that is it for this week! And thank you all again for reading and sticking by me throughout this all!